There Gotta Be a Change In My Life'
by DrKCooper
Summary: What would Frost have said about Jane leaving BPD without Maura? Takes place during "Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow (07x12).


_Disclaimer: All recognizable_ Rizzoli & Isles _characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners including, but not limited to TNT. The original characters and plot are the property of the author of this fan fiction story. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any previously copyrighted material. No financial gain is associated with the publishing of this story. No copyright infringement is intended._

 _Author's Note: I am beyond frustrated with this season, particularly the penultimate episode. So, instead of wallowing in my misery and disappointment, here is a piece I thought up in a world where Barry Frost (and LTY) didn't leave us. What would Frost have said about Jane leaving BPD without Maura? Takes place during "Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow (07x12) while Jane is at dinner with Agent Davies, but before she, well, takes him home with her. The title comes from Charles Bradley's "Changes." This was quickly strummed out and may contain typos. My apologies. -dkc_

'There Gotta Be a Change In My Life'

"Dr. Isles?" the familiar voice caught Maura's attention despite the rowdy crowd in the Robber on that Thursday evening.

Turning around to see the detective approaching her table, Maura smiled. There were few men she liked and respected as much as Barry Frost.

"Detective," she smiled.

"May I join you?" his words hardly exited his mouth before she was nodding. "Why are you sitting here by yourself this evening?"

Maura briefly considered why exactly she was there alone on a weeknight.

"I wasn't quite ready to go home. A drink sounded good," she smiled, fingering the stem of her wine glass.

"I meant..." he paused, considering if he should or shouldn't ask where his partner was tonight.

"Jane is on a date," Maura blurted out before Frost could decide if he should ask.

"Oh," he said as he processed her tone and what certainly came off as frustration or disappointment.

She smiled in a way that confused the detective. He had no idea what he should say.

"Detective Frost—Barry—you are exceptional at your job. I sense you questioning your instincts right now. I also know you are too polite to overstep. Let me make it easy for you: Jane is on a date with the agent from the FBI that may or may not work out and, despite my better judgment, I am rooting for it to be a failure."

The way Maura spoke was dispassionate. He let it all sink in, nodding to express his comprehension of what she was saying. He then smiled that gorgeous smile of his.

"Has it ever occurred to you that she might accept these dates in order to force the issue?" he asked.

"Force which issue? I'm afraid I don't follow," she didn't lie, but she also wasn't 100% honest about what she knew and didn't.

"I realize I may be out of my lane here, Doc, but it's obvious that the two of you have something special. I dare say it is the most important relationship either of you have ever had. Every date, failed or otherwise, brings this very idea to the forefront of your minds. Maybe Jane, consciously or subconsciously, agrees to these dates to force all of it into the open. Perhaps you do the same thing. This dance you do with one another has only been expedited by Jane accepting the job in Virginia."

Maura knew Barry to be a thoughtful, reasoned man and that was only reinforced by his observations.

"She is everything to me," Maura spoke softly.

"I know," he allowed her to direct their conversation.

When she looked up again from her wine glass, she saw nothing but support and concern in the eyes of her friend. She couldn't imagine herself leaving everything she had found here in Boston and yet Jane was doing that very thing.

"She wants so badly to make her mother happy. She wants a different life where she isn't in danger or putting those she loves in danger. Yet she seems to have come to terms with the very fact that she is sacrificing seeing those she loves everyday for that outcome."

"Have you considered following Jane to Virginia?" his question took her by surprise, her crinkled brow expressed her confusion. "They certainly need pathologists at Quantico. You could also take some time off, finish your book."

"She hasn't asked me to," was Maura's only answer.

He replied with a wry chuckle.

"You and I both know that Jane doesn't know how to ask for anything. She is, without question, the most stubborn person we have ever met. If she wants something, she isn't about to ask for it. It has to be presented to her. You have to ask the question yourself or force it on her."

Despite knowing the truth in this, Maura had no desire to force something like this upon her best friend. Some part of her needed Jane to make the realization and ask for herself.

"I will give this some thought," she smiled. "Thank you for your candor. Let me buy you a drink."

As she was waving down the newest employee of the Dirty Robber, none other than Jane Rizzoli waltzed through the door. Dressed in a spectacular black dress that showed off both her muscular arms, but also her beautiful skin tone, she radiated confidence.

"I think I'll take a rain check," Frost winked at the doctor.

Standing from his seat, he held it out for Jane and smiled at them both as he made his exit.

"What? Do I smell?" Jane's self-deprecating humor somehow managed to complement her radiant confidence.

Maura chose not to open dialogue about Frost or she would inevitably find herself in a position of having to avoid what it was they were talking about.

"How was dinner? I'm surprised to see you here," Maura finished her wine and this time caught the eye of the server who was a table away and quickly before them. "Another and a Blue Moon."

Once the server had backed away from their table, Jane found herself being assessed by her friend. There was something mysterious in the way Frost had taken his exit. She got the impression Maura didn't want to talk about it and she, for once, didn't press.

"Where did you think I would be?" she did ask.

"Didn't your date go well?" she asked a question for which she hoped for a negative response.

"It did. Though I'm not sure what to make of it, to be honest," Rizzoli gave a charming smile to the woman who delivered her beer.

"The job?"

"No, actually. I've quite clear about what the job is. I have no problem with the job. Except for the job being in Virginia, of course."

"What then?" the M.E. swallowed hard as she prepared herself for what she was afraid might follow.

"Agent Davies…Cameron…made a proposition," she spoke with an uncertainty that was uncharacteristic of Jane.

"Oh."

It didn't take a rocket scientist or, in this case, a nationally recognized pathologist with a genius-level IQ to understand what Jane was saying.

"Then I suppose I should again ask why you are here."

There was an edge to Maura's voice not lost on Jane. She tried to find a way to approach this with tact.

"He would like to help me adjust—settle—into the job and the area."

Jane took a long pull of her beer. Maura couldn't get the word "settle" from repeating like a broken record in her head. Her heart was in her throat. She hated that tears were threatening.

"It would be nice to know someone in the area, wouldn't it?" she found her words exiting her mouth in a way that sounded foreign to her muddled mind.

"Yeah…" Jane sighed.

"He isn't your direct superior, correct?"

"No, no," she had a hard time looking at Maura. "That's not it."

"Do you have chemistry?"

"Yeah, I guess," Jane looked into her lap.

"What is it?" Maura braced herself; afraid for the stability of her wine glass, she set it on the table.

"It's not like you and me, you know?"

This was far from what Maura had expected to hear. She took a moment to catch her breath and stared at Jane. The detective eventually looked up from the phantom thread of her dress.

"You and I, we have chemistry in spades. He's great, but, well, it wouldn't be anything like—"

"Us," Maura cut her off.

A much-detested tear escaped the corner of Maura's right eye and made its way slowly down her cheek. She swiped at it quickly in hopes that Jane hadn't noticed it.

"I don't know what to do, Maur."

Jane was now rubbing the scars on her hands, obviously nervous.

"What is it you don't know?" the doctor did everything in her power to prevent a seed of hope from being planted in her mind.

"The job is great, you know? It's safe; it's something new. I think I would be good at it," Maura nodded at the latter statement. "But it's not Boston."

"What would make it better? Perfect?" the doctor's near whisper revealed her worry over what Jane might say.

Jane finished off her beer, seemingly deep in thought. However, she wasn't looking for an answer, she knew the answer, she was looking for courage.

"Jane?" Maura gently requested an answer.

"You." Jane let out a breath, running her hands through her hair. "You, okay? I'm a grown woman and I need my...best friend."

The way the detective had paused before saying "best friend" had left Maura both elated and frustrated. Was that all she was to Jane? And if so, why was her presence in Virginia so necessary? They had been over and over the mileage to and from Boston, the technology available to them—Skype, FaceTime, Snapchat—and the late night phone calls and texts. What was it that required Maura's physical presence with Jane in Virginia?

"Oh…" Maura's voice was tired, disappointed even.

"You will be just fine. You know that. You're perfect for this job, like you said. You'll be good at it. You'll make friends with your colleagues; you're good at ingratiating yourself to people."

"I know," her attention moved to the label on her beer bottle. "You're right."

Maura's heart was breaking and she couldn't forestall the flood of emotions from escaping her for long.

"I'm going home," she pushed her wine glass toward the middle of the table, standing and reaching for her purse to tip the server. "It will be okay, Jane."

If only she could bring herself to believe it. _Would it be okay_ , she wondered. _Will I be okay?_

Jane watched as Maura headed toward the door, unable to say anything that might continue the conversation or keep Maura any longer. She felt tears building. She couldn't process all that had happened that evening. Agent Davies was nice, more than nice, but she couldn't see herself settling in Virginia with, with what? A boyfriend? It seemed foreign to her. Someone else would take up the time she had always reserved for Maura after work and on weekends. It felt wrong. She felt a sadness that she hadn't felt in years.

Making an impulsive decision, Jane stood, threw a few dollars on the table and rushed toward the door. Out on the sidewalk she looked both ways to try to spot the doctor. Had she parked at the station and headed back or was her car in the parking lot? She spotted a familiar gait moving gracefully across the street. She darted behind a car and across the street.

"Maura!" she shouted, surprising the old man that was out walking his dachshund.

Offering a smile of an apology to the man as she passed him the sidewalk and headed toward the medical examiner who had turned around, an expression of confusion on her face.

"Wait," Jane was slightly out of breath as she caught up to Maura. "I…"

Taking a deep breath, she composed herself. The doctor stood stiffly in front of her friend, an eyebrow raised as she waited for an explanation. Her heart beat became more noticeable.

"Ask me again."

Jane's request was hard to follow.

"Excuse me?"

"Ask me again," Jane's dark eyes were now on Maura, there was an expectation in them that wasn't quite readable. "The job—ask me again what would make it better."

"Okay—" the doctor's breath was harder to find. "What would make the job better for you?"

The way she spoke was with trepidation as well as hope. That seed of hope she had attempted to thwart from being planted was there after all. She couldn't stand being disappointed again. This was too hard. Losing Jane to Virginia was hard enough. Losing Jane to a life that sounded unlike her friend was even harder.

"You," Jane said with a firm commitment.

"You said that before, Jane." Maura rolled her eyes at the repetitive nature of their conversations.

"But I didn't say this," Jane reached for Maura's hand, keeping her eyes firmly on the beautiful hazel that she had lost herself in many times. "You. I need you. Not just my best friend, the woman I love."

Maura's breath caught and tears once again threatened. She didn't know what to say or how to interpret what Jane had said beyond the superficial basics.

"I…" she stalled, hoping a reaction would solidify in her mind.

"Don't say anything. Let me say this:" Jane took Maura's other hand, standing before her with the kind of assertiveness that was so much like her. "You and I have an undeniable chemistry, not as two friends do, though we do, but it's more than that. You are my rock. You've been my best friend, my confidant, my confessor, my closest ally, my family and the person I care the most for. As I've prepared myself for the FBI, I can get my head around not seeing my family every day, but I can't get my head or heart around the thought of not seeing you. I can't imagine not walking into your house in the morning for coffee. I can't imagine not going to work with you everyday. I can't imagine not being able to walk down to your office when I have a question or when I need an escape."

There were tears falling down Maura's cheeks, her mascara battling with the chemistry of liquid and salt. She couldn't speak if she had needed to right then.

"But you know what is hardest for me to imagine? Not having those moments throughout the week when you look at me with such care and compassion, with a hint of teasing, and for a second I can't decide what it means. Those moments when my heart beats a little harder in my chest and my palms get clammy."

"Jane…" Maura's voice cracked. "I—"

"Wait," the taller woman's finger touched Maura's lips to stop the words from continuing. "I want it to be you. I want you to be the one I come home to. I want to walk in and see your face, smiling over a glass of wine or serious as you read one of your medical journals. I can't imagine a life without your laugh next to me as we drive down the road, singing at the top of our lungs to the radio. Without your friendship…without your unconditional love."

"I—" the syllable was stifled. The finger still at her was quickly dropped, the hand landing at her collar. There weren't words for what the doctor was feeling. She hadn't a clue how to respond to all of that. Instead she leaned forward and pressed her soft lips to Jane's and waited for the answer to the question that had hung in the air between them for more than seven years and yet had never been asked.

The kiss was immediately heated. All of the words they had never spoken aloud, each touch they had held back and every moment when they chastised themselves for a lingering look found its remedy now. Jane's fingers lightly traced the doctor's jaw line when their mouths parted.

"That was far from expected," Maura smiled.

"Help me," Jane's breathy plea was both sultry and sincere.

"Hmm?" the doctor's lips vibrated against Jane's own.

Jane pulled back enough that their eyes could meet and they could focus on what she was about to say.

"Help me settle. In Virginia, you know? Take a break from all this," she gestured around them. "Work on your book. It'll be a change of scenery. And once I have my feet under me you can come back here, work in the lab during the week; work at Quantico if you want. We can do weekends and holidays. Whatever you want. I can't do this without you…beside me. With me."

Those final two words once again brought tears to Maura's eyes. She wanted nothing more.

"Of course," she cried. "Of course."

"Yeah?"

Rizzoli's brilliant smile lit up her entire face. She breathed a sigh of relief before leaning in to press another kiss to the now familiar lips. This time the kiss reflected love and commitment, not the desperation and need of their first kiss.

"Yes."

- _finis_ -


End file.
